Everyone is not excited to see you get out of drug rehab.

If you’ve been out for at least 24 hours, you’ve realized this by now. First off, addiction has a stigma within the black community; therefore, kudos to you for getting the needed help. Unfortunately, growing up black, we are brought up to believe that those hospitalized for addiction are “inferior” to what society views as “normal.” In regards to the backlash that can come from such a narrow-minded society, if you’re tenderhearted, this can hurt—bad. The horrible truth is, in the eyes of some, you’re weak because you succumbed to a mental obsession that led to addiction. This, in turn, drove you to the brink of insanity. Words like “rehab” aren’t typically used in the same sentence as “pride” and “educated” within the black community, as the ignorant notion that alcoholism is a behavioral issue still lurks about in the minds of our opinionated peers.

"I mean if she wanted to stop drinking she would’ve just stopped, right? She used because she wanted to."

Who finds joy in being a drunk? In my own personal experience, if I could’ve stopped, I would have. No, I didn’t get a kick out of sinking into a chaotic blackout, stumbling with stupidity through a drunken stupor or betraying the trust of loved ones. However, I was literally physically and mentally sick with the disease of alcoholism. This illness, like lupus and cancer, required mandatory treatment in order for me to regain sanity and physical health.

Now, for the black women going back into a stigma infused society and culture after trying to rehabilitate, just to let you know, the stories about you being a drunk, junkie, menace to society etc. probably won’t stop. However, there are many ways that you can allow yourself to cope better with the stigma.

DISTANCE

That’s right. When we’re fresh out of rehab, it’s best that we distance ourselves from everyone for just a little while. Believe me, the time is much needed. It’s perfectly okay to use this time to continue a deeper connection with a power greater than ourselves, along with perfecting our program of sobriety. Feel free to fill your time with long walks, meditation, yoga, reading, etc. The hard part is over, therefore, we reserve the right to focus on nothing else but us.

THE PAST

Though the past is relatively fresh, we should make pertinent strides to engage ourselves in activities that enhance our minds while having positive effects on our program of sobriety.

ACCEPTANCE

We have to accept the fact that we are recovering addicts/alcoholics. There will always be those people who are patiently waiting for us to relapse. Due to proving ourselves untrustworthy during the height of our illness, there are those that will always consider us drunken idiots regardless of our current state of sobriety. We can’t let this discourage us. Discouragement leads to depression, which can lead to relapse. The solution will always be to stay positive, focused and resilient.

YOU ARE NOT A PUNCHING BAG

Constructive criticism is not constructive if it comes from someone who hasn’t constructed anything. Yes, there will be those who are extremely resentful toward us because they met you at the depths of your disease. We simply make amends with those people and move forward. We can’t allow them to subject us to constant badgering, unhelpful conversation, and demented judgment. We just got our peace and sanity back, right?

It’s our recovery, not anyone else’s. How we work our program of recovery, where we work it or the methods that we use, are strictly up to us. In the grand scheme of things, it really doesn’t matter; just as long as we stay sober. We’re actually heroes, contrary to the stigma of failure that is so often placed on us. So, whereas we feel like our story is our biggest downfall, it’s really our greatest asset.

Lisa Crump Burton

Writing since September 2017 · 1 story contributed