No matter what your situation is, single, married, complicated, etc. if children are involved, stress is absolutely bound to come. I have two, one is 12 and the other is 1, so imagine my life right now. Unfortunately, I’m not a magical unicorn who has it all together, although I know it can appear that way at times. Everybody needs a release. Here are some ways I cope with the stress.

Prayer/Meditation

I am a Christian woman and I find it extremely helpful to pray and meditate often. I never realized how necessary it was until I had baby #2. I learned to make time for it. I schedule my prayer time and I meditate every day. When I don’t, other things suffer. Making time to tap into that divine energy helps me remain grateful and appreciative for my life, albeit chaotic and crazy, it’s a blessing.

Find A Hobby

Before you had children, you enjoyed the “more fun” things in life. What did you enjoy in high school? I played sports, I was in the band, I loved a good crafting session and I loved to paint. As a 27+ year-old, I’ve rediscovered some of those hobbies. There are plenty of adult sports leagues, so join one, even if you’re not good, it’s still fun. Delve into the world of mom’s groups, they cover a wide array of hobbies and it’s always a positive thing to make mom-friends who can relate to your struggles.

Establish A Bedtime

I am the worst when it comes to this, but I’ve seen the mountaintop of children going to bed at a decent hour and I shall not give up. Not only is it important for your kids to get enough rest so they can terrorize you the next day, kidding (not really), once they go to bed, quiet hours have begun. You can get some work done, binge watch your favorite tv shows or just sit on the couch in silence without someone climbing all over you or asking you to record their 40^thmusical.ly video of the evening.

Enjoy A Glass of Wine

A glass, not a bottle. Very relaxing. Wine always understands. Wine never disappoints. Wine is always there. Wine cares. Wine wins.

Start a Group Text Chat With Mom Friends

This is one of my favorite pastimes. When I’m feeling stressed about anything, I can hit up the group chat. Having someone who can relate to my stress has become a serious form of therapy. Talk to your gal pals and let the relief come.

Make A Bomb Playlist

I had a lot of odd jobs and random hobbies in my wild days. My mad existence afforded me some DJ skills. When I have time, which isn’t often, I make playlists. I schedule a time for nobody to be home and I just dance. Fun fact: I have no rhythm and can’t twerk to save my soul, but when I hear some good 90s R&B like After 7, Mary J. Blige, Brandy, etc. I dance, dance, dance my troubles away. If you need a playlist, let me know!

Me Time

Reject the slander that your life is over when you have children. You are not a robot, your life is not over. Self-care is the best care. Your sanity is important. Take yourself to dinner, go to a movie, go for a walk, go canoeing, go to the spa, make an area of your house off limits, GO TO PUERTO RICO, I don’t care what you do. Find some peace and enjoy it on purpose. It’s okay, the chaos will still be there when you get back

Domonique A.

Writing since March 2017 · 2 stories contributed